Sitting in my silence

-
 Somehow I am not enough 

But I am also too much 

Enough to be lusted after 

But not enough to be loved


Sitting in my silence 

My thoughts are the loudest 

Do my friends even like me

Is everyone against me


My goals are out of reach 

I’m unmotivated to do anything 

I sit and sit in the silence of my room

wondering what’s wrong with me


I fear no one actually likes me

They feel bad for me 

Invite me out to bars out of pity 

Surrounded by people and feeling alone


I know I’m a nuisance

I hear myself talking and hating how I sound 

No one cares what I’m saying 

But the word vomit never stops 


I annoy everyone around me

They’re tired of me, I can tell 

I want to throw my phone away 

Just disappear from everyone 


I think they would be happier 

If I were to vanish without a trace

No one would even notice I’m gone 

They would have peace and quiet once I’m out of the way 

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